Virtual reality has its perks, one of which is virtual muscles. In the faceless realm of cyberspace, I faced off against a guy who promised "my mother would weep after he'd finished with me." And he could do it too, he said. He was badass and big and knew how to fight.
Yeah, this dude was going to deliver a beatdown the likes of which hadn't been seen since Godzilla trashed Tokyo. But not before he told me and the rest of the world (about 14 people in this particular chat room) how much of a stupid asshole I was.
What could possibly push a guy to such violence? Insulting his mother? Questioning his sexual inclination? Casting aspersions on his religious beliefs?
No, nothing so inflammatory. I merely asked why he thought Volkswagen's R32 was the "ultimate sports car." I asked him to support his statement with fact.
Now, anyone who knows me knows my affinity for VWs. Like a great many ec readers, I grew up with them, tuned them, raced them, loved them. Hell, I was even conceived in a Volkswagen bus. And for the record, I love the R32, even tried to buy one once. That I couldn't see the R32 as "the ultimate sports car" just proved how ignorant I was of my readership, how out of touch I was with the masses, how stupid I was. According to VWrulz58, I should quit the business and sell shoes in a gay-only department store. And for all these transgressions I would need to be punished, physically.
Obviously, I realize there was a certain amount of bravado in his words. He wasn't really going to come to my office and beat me up in front of my colleagues.
Or was he?
His threats can only be translated as a love letter to VW. That he spoke this fervently in defense of a car showed a level of passion that makes me green with envy. This dude was going to kick my ass because of a car. I want to feel like that about something, anything.
We've been asked to become more involved on the web side of ec. I'm not in a big hurry (can you blame me?). While there are millions of intelligent, lucid people cruising the forums, it seems the vocal majority are the ones you don't want to hear. And when you engage these people, it always seems to spiral into the "well, you're gay" default mode. C'mon... there are much snappier comebacks. Besides, right now, nebulous sexuality is cool; in a way, they're paying a compliment.
Eventually, the web will play a bigger role in ec. It will augment, not replace the magazine. But I'd like to propose an intelligence test before folks are allowed to post. I don't mind belligerent, outspoken wankers, I just ask that they support their statements with well-written intelligence. That makes the exchange better for everyone.
Well, I've got to go. Got a date with VWrulz58 at 3pm by the bike racks. He's promised to "school" me with his big muscles and all. I can't wait to see this virtual monster.Les BidrawnEditoreuropean.firstname.lastname@example.org