Super Street Network

 |   |  Audi Dynamic Suspension System - Resonator
Subscribe to the Free
Newsletter

Audi Dynamic Suspension System - Resonator

Jul 1, 2009

Forty feet beneath the surface of the Atlantic, I found myself lying on patch of white sand at the edge of a reef. I was blowing bubble rings with my regulator, watching them surge upward, seeing how long until they burst. During the last set, a pair of blacktip sharks cruised overhead, curious about the stupid diver wasting his air. I couldn't help but think of the 1971 Corvette Stingray and its "shark gill" intakes... 40 feet underwater. What a dweeb.

Sharks really are perfect animals, both graceful and efficient. They're also fairly benign creatures... until you piss them off.

Enter a spoiled rich kid. Clad in the best gear, he treated everything and everyone with the same disrespect only money can buy.

I had told everyone in my dive group not to mess with the marine life or each other. I guess he thought it didn't apply to him.

I watched as he prodded a small reef shark with a fiberglass pole. I could tell it was getting angry as its dorsal and pectoral fins arched and its body became rigid. The rich kid made a grab for its tail and tried to drag it back to the group. The shark folded itself in half and bit him square on the left nipple, refusing to let go. It was sort of comical as he tried to pull the fish from his boob; I didn't know skin could stretch that far.

As far as I was concerned, the punk deserved it. Perhaps he would learn something here.

Epcp_0907_04_z+audi_a5+side_view Photo 2/3   |   Audi Dynamic Suspension System - Resonator

I'm pretty sure the same punk was tailing me last night. I was driving the new Audi A5, minding my own business in the Zen-like trance really good cars induce. The Sirius satellite radio has a few Trance music stations that make for great driving music. A Mitsubishi Eclipse had been dicing it up behind me, going from one side of the freeway to the other like a racer heating his tires. He lodged two feet from my rear bumper and stayed there, NASCAR-style. I wasn't in the far left lane but still, I figured I'd just move outta the way and let this Bozo bug out. As he flew past he flicked me the finger.

Ten years ago I would have done something, probably stupid. Today, I'd rather stay in my groove and just ignore it.

Ten minutes later I begin to merge onto the cloverleaf off-ramp. Out of nowhere comes Mr. Eclipse. I get a good look at his car this time. It (how do I say this inoffensively?) is "riced-out," wearing rocker panel tattoos, huge lipped wheels and a rock-like suspension. He flips me the bird... again. I let him pass just as we begin the long, decreasing-radius turn.

I had been playing with the Audi's Dynamic Suspension system, toggling from comfort to dynamic to sport and back again. At the touch of a button the Audi's demeanor changes considerably. The car feels 25 percent stiffer and the headlamps' oscillations become markedly tighter. The steering and throttle maps become more responsive, more aggressive. If this car were a shark, you could tell it was ready to fight, its body rigid and unyielding.

Epcp_0907_03_z+mitsubishi_eclipse+side_view Photo 3/3   |   Audi Dynamic Suspension System - Resonator

Mr. Eclipse is oblivious as I follow, slowly reeling him in, getting closer. He's getting flustered as his engine screams and yet his car fails to pull away. His Eclipse is bouncing now, sort of skipping over the pavement. I'm fairly certain his spring rates have overwhelmed the shocks, a typical mismatched setup designed for looks rather than performance. I stay in position for a few more seconds-I'm going to give the guy a serious haircut. The Audi is unflappable, bored even; the tires are barely whispering. The Mitsu, however, appears to be fumbling on ice, screaming bloody murder. I drop back just before he throws it away.

The whole exercise lasted maybe ten seconds. As the road straightens, he stays in the right lane, barely doing the speed limit. He's looking straight ahead with eyes as big as his oversized wheels. Perhaps he learned something here.

More than likely, he'd seen the latest Fast and Furious flick. Poseurs tend to get more aggressive after seeing their favorite stars in CGI chase scenes. In fact, I'd wager the accident rate climbs in the next few months. Silly kids. Real cars can't do that kind of stuff. It would be safer trying to bench press your car rather than jump it over a bridge

I'm in no way belittling the movie (actually, it was entertaining). I just find it incredible how little respect some people have for simple physics.

It's been said that there is no better teacher than experience. Some folks just need to get bitten to move ahead. Hopefully it worked for these guys.

Les Bidrawn
Editor
european.car@sorc.com

BROWSE CARS BY MARKET

MORE FEATURES

Preview the February 2019 edition of Super Street - our Calendar Issue - featuring an EK9 Civic Type R, 900hp JZA80 Supra RZ, the new Toyo Girls, and more!
Dec 13, 2018
Dubbed “Racing Through the Ages,” this collection of six special 570S MSO coupes and spiders pays homage to McLaren's racing heritage
Ed TahaneyDec 13, 2018
The tastefully executed exterior, sweet plaid upholstery, and an E30 M3 inline-six make this an almost perfect build
Ed TahaneyDec 12, 2018
With the sixth generation of the BMW 3 Series arriving in March, the incoming 330i is roomier, quicker, more adept, and a sharper performer.
ManufacturerDec 12, 2018
The $3.2 million Aston Martin Valkyrie will get a naturally aspirated 6.5-liter V-12 that makes 1,000 hp at 11,100 rpm
Alex NishimotoDec 12, 2018
Sponsored Links

SEARCH ARTICLES BY MAKE/MODEL

Search
CLOSE X
BUYER'S GUIDE
SEE THE ALL NEW
NEWS, REVIEWS & SPECS
TO TOP