Here is a conversation that you'll never hear in the super high-tech conference room of the Super Street think tank:
Rich: So, how are we doing with the stories for this month?
Bryn: This month? Ha, you must mean next month because this month's stories were done three weeks ago, you ninny.
Joe: Yeah, I'm so far ahead that I had this very meeting with myself last month. You know, right after I traded in my Porsche for the Ferrari.
Rich: Oh yeah, that's right. Silly me, slip of the tongue. Bryn, could you please pass the squid? I'm famished.
Bryn: Steamed or fried?
Rich: Fried. Let's live dangerously.
Jonny: Let the chips fall as they may?
Rich: Exactly.
Jonny: Barkeep, another round on me.
No no no. Things aren't like that here at all. In fact, the super high-tech conference room isn't even that high-tech. The telephone doesn't have a speaker, the dry erase markers are running, well, dry, and the TV doesn't come with cable. Actually, the room has but a table and chairs. Anyway, no such meeting took place because right now as I write this, we are in the violent eye of the storm. We have one week left to finish the magazine, and we just got the cover image back of Shaun Carlson's Meguiar's-sponsored Ford Focus drag car.
So, while Art Directorazzi Extraordinaire Gail works her magic, we are losing our days, hours, and minutes at our computers. Jonny is putting together three major tech stories at the same time-the HKS turbo install, the A'pex V-AFC install and test, and a Blitz throttle body install for all you all-motor lovers out there.
Meanwhile, Joe the FNG is knee-deep in a brand-new department we are introducing to the magazine this month. We are calling it "The Source" because that's what it'll become-the only place you'll need to go to find what parts are available for your car. It'll appear every month, so no matter which issue of Super Street you pick up, you'll find The Source. We'll be growing it slowly and highlighting the newest products to hit the compact performance scene.
"And where is Bryn?" you're probably asking. Well, right now she's working at two computers. After our copy editor left us for a position spinning records at The Boutique (or something completely unrelated to that), Bryn swooped in with her deity-like skills for Quark and grammar, and is currently saving us from ourselves. Aside from that, she's also trying to decipher wiring schemes for boost gauges, so she can photograph them in the dark because some tyrant of a newbie editor thought, "Wouldn't it be neat if we showed how the gauges glow in the dark?"
Among the few stories that are complete is the News department because News is simple and News is easy. News is more than the mere regurgitation of press releases but not much more. News doesn't require knowledge of wiring schemes or Quark. News is friendly to all who encounter it. Yes, News is all of these things. Except when Stephan Papadakis calls the office telling us that he's just broken the 8-second barrier. That's when News becomes another species of animal altogether. It becomes a beast.
At the last minute, we have to ixnay a less timely news piece for this more timely one on Steph and his accomplishment-no-his victory over naysayers and 9s. Eight seconds in a front-wheel-drive car. We still have problems swallowing that news. Therefore, it was worth the effort, right?
Yes, we are busy, and we are spinning around like medflies from fruit to fruit. We are a machine. We are communicating through thoughts. Our movements aren't pretty. And we are a family-a dysfunctional family. We snap and we bite. We joke despite impending doom. Believe it or not, the process is a beautiful thing to watch and participate in. An interloper might find such an environment excruciatingly unsettling, or even maddening. To those we say: Piss off.-Richard S. Changsstreet@emapUSA.com